Lately, I find myself being easily annoyed. More than usual.
A lot of loose ends, small things, missed opportunities, and pain – both physical and mental.
A lot of small things, when I really should be facing at more important things.
Why do we let the small things bother us?
There’s no big thing to look at
We let a lot of the small things bother us, when we’re not clear on what big thing we should be looking at.
When you don’t have a goal, a purpose, a focus, then you get pulled in every which direction.
With no real direction at all.
Whenever I don’t have a focus, or a goal to go for, it’s easier for me to feel uninspired, unmotivated, and to just drift.
Suddenly, little speed bumps that were no problem at all, become pains and heartaches. Our mind naturally looks for a focus, and if there is none, then it will focus on what is available right in front of it.
Even when it’s really little compared to the other good things going on in our life.
When there are no big rocks in a garden, every little rock suddenly seems like a big rock.
It’s a matter of perspective, and perception.
We have ineffective habits
Modern life has taught us to become experts at getting nothing done. And they’re using the science of habits against us.
When we’re tired, go lay on the couch, pop a couple of beers, watch episodes on Netflix, or read comics, or play games.
And then come out still tired and drained, instead of being recharged.
I lived that kind of life for a good two years, and have nothing to show for it except a bad back, clothes that don’t fit, confidence that was clearly not confident, and a whole lot of regret.
Because we have ineffective habits, whenever life throws a wrench at us, we scramble to try to cope.
It’s about having the capability and resources to weather any storm and problem.
In the sequence of habits I shared earlier, was I developing capability? Was I seriously recharging? I was just becoming a vegetable.
A mentor of mine shared to me that whenever you find yourself having only energy to stare at a screen, or grab whatever you can find and stuff it in your face, that’s a sign that you should be sleeping instead.
Find activities that truly recharge.
Find yourself creating new stuff. Find what’s fun.
Exercise, or get some physical activity in.
Build effective habits, and the small things won’t be bothersome anymore.
There’s always tomorrow
I get irritated at all the small things, when I tell myself that I can put off for tomorrow what I need to get done, today.
Because I give in to the pain. I give in to the discomfort, and to my ego telling me that the conditions are not perfect, and I’d rather not do it.
I just went to a wedding of one of my cousins. I went along with my grandmother, who at 95 years of age, was still thrilled to be a part of the celebration.
She couldn’t speak straight, is moody, didn’t want to eat a lot, except that which she favored, and was so concerned about her clothes getting wet.
One more day. It seemed to me like another day given to her is a blessing. Another day to spend with us, another blessing.
And here I am, problematizing whether to get something done today, or wait until tomorrow.
Tomorrow’s not going to be any different, unless you decide to be.
Just looking at my grandmother now, and how fast her health has been deteriorating, pushes me to just get things done now. All the small things don’t matter when you’re faced with the fact that you could leave this earth at any time.
You don’t have control over when your time will be up.
You do have control over how you spend your time, and how you take care of yourself, your purpose, of others, and their purpose as well.
Now. Why wait for tomorrow?
My grandmother sometimes whispers in my ear, wishes she could go back in time to spend more time with my grandfather, who she misses dearly now.
It’s all small things.
Or as the book says – Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff.
And by the way, it’s all small stuff.
In the face of purpose, focus, death, and your effective habits, everything else unimportant becomes irrelevant.
Focus on what is important.
Don’t get sidetracked by the small stuff.