Are you aware of the power that you have over yourself?
We ultimately are all the product of our own decisions, whether we are aware of them, or not.
But too many people are still stuck, waiting for other people, circumstances beyond their control, to come through for them, and fulfill them.
To make their life, happen to them. Biggest lie ever perpetuated through media, and people’s behaviors.
What are 4 things that we make for ourselves, but we may not be aware of?
Future
We are the result of the decisions that we make. The everyday decisions, accumulated over time.
I remember being so focused, only on the now, and on the immediate future, not realizing that every decision that I made would have an effect on the long-term.
It’s not even the big decisions that have an impact on the future that we make for ourselves. It’s the small decisions moment to moment, day to day, that has an impact.
I used to be a huge soda drinker, and I remember telling myself what’s the harm in drinking a can of soda everyday? So then, drink regularly, I did.
And in no time, after a few months, I felt my clothes were not fitting well, I felt less energy, and lower over-all health. I could feel myself getting more and more sick.
Then, my back gave out, and I found myself not able to walk normally, and in constant pain. A product of the hours I spent not sitting with the correct posture, not taking care of my health, neglecting myself, and making poor choices, day to day, moment to moment.
Without realizing it, I had created a future for myself, that I didn’t want to be in. I didn’t want to have any part of that future, but since I wasn’t aware of the accumulation of the results of the decisions I was making, I ended up in a bigger pinch than what I expected to be.
1% better everyday for a year is a 37 times improvement over the original, while a 1% decrease everyday for a year, would mean a 98% decrease of the original. That’s how big the accumulated results of 1% better or lower would give you.
It’s scary, but it gives hope.
Because it’s a myth that big progress and change is a result of big actions. It’s the small actions day to day that will get you to the big change that you want to happen.
Small actions, done consistently, make the future that you want. Be purposeful and deliberate.
Meaning
Things are what they are. Only we create the meaning and interpretations of these things and events that happen to us.
It’s our choice. Our decision, or reaction, to attach specific meanings and interpretations to the events and circumstances that happen to us in life, even to our achievements, goals, and dreams.
And we can either make the meaning empowering, or disempowering for us.
I grew up in a privileged household, and yet, because of what I saw my parents do, I ended up believing that money was so difficult to come by, and that it wasn’t easy to make money; that you had to fight tooth and nail for it.
So what happened to me, fast forward many years later? I didn’t have any money, and kept blaming the circumstances of my childhood.
Because those were the interpretations that I attached not only those circumstances, but hose those influenced me and my present state.
Unlike a friend of mine, who despite losing a parent, and their family business, continued to rebuild, and is happy with his life right now. He could’ve easily ended up, otherwise.
But he focused on creating good interpretations for himself, empowering interpretations, that pushed him to go beyond, and not be shackled by the possible negative interpretations of the events that happened in his life.
It’s not the events and circumstances that are bad, or good, per se. It’s our interpretations and how we allow those to serve, or rob us.
Love
Because to learn how to love yourself, is one of the greatest skills we can develop.
I’m not saying we shouldn’t make an effort to love others. What I am saying is, how can we really love other people, when we don’t even know how to love ourselves?
I, and many others, were once caught in situations of our own making. I wanted to make a difference, so then, I poured my heart and soul into building, giving, offering what I had for others. I was tireless.
Or so I thought.
Little by little, I felt the pain, the darkness, gnawing at me. Because I didn’t know how to love myself, and in hindsight, I never really did, at the time, I felt the resentment, the anger, the comparisons growing inside of me.
I was burning up, and burning out.
I began to hate the very people I was serving, and eventually started to create negative interpretations for the circumstances and actions I found myself a part of.
Because I wasn’t kind to myself. Because I wasn’t loving myself.
I based my love for self on what I could do for other people. But what happens to that when I’m not able to do anything? When other people don’t approve? I then found myself lacking.
Because I based my love for self on the opinions of other people. When that happens, you find very little love for you. You enter into a dark, descending spiral of becoming an emotional vampire, looking for affection and acceptance from other people.
People other than yourself.
If you won’t love yourself, accept yourself, then who else truly will?
Your happiness is not based on other people. It’s not their responsibility.
It’s yours.
Take charge, and make something for yourself
Because our life is in our hands, and in nobody else’s.
We’re just living the illusions that other people have control of our live. Probably because we’ve lost control, and given it up to other people. Or to events.
Even to our past.
Make time for yourself, be kind to yourself, and love yourself.
For yourself.
What do you do to take care of yourself? Please share in the comments below!
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