I was in a meeting with teachers, mentors, coaches, and leaders. We all each had our respective fields, and we noticed that young people nowadays needed help in becoming an adult. Help that older and more experienced people can provide.
Help that I wished I also received when I was younger.
That conversation got me thinking – what’s the most basic behavior of a fully-functioning and effective adult?
Upon listening to what was being shared, and thinking about it, it’s this:
It’s being able to take care of one’s self, and take care of others.
Being able to take care of one’s self.
We were specifically talking about millennials, the youngest members of the workforce, and how dynamic, full of energy, and driven they could be.
And also, how clueless they can be.
As we all were at the start. This wasn’t just for the youngest people in the office.
“Why not a tutorial about how to do and file your taxes? A lot of young people need that.”
“How to do practical stuff around the house is another great subject.”
Listening to the conversation, I realized that a lot of the skills and behaviors that we felt young people needed, or the young people felt they needed, was about fending for themselves, and navigating the realities of the world they live in.
Getting things done because it would fulfill their requirements and lead to an easier time.
Getting better at their job or career, to be able to not only earn a living, but to live with meaning.
Learning to be independent, building freedom, and learning to be truly free.
And it wasn’t only about taking care of work, tasks, and other requirements, but more importantly, it was about learning to take care of one’s self.
Learning how to handle stress, frustration, anxiety, hurt, pain, and overwhelming joy and excitement.
Learning how to handle themselves, their thoughts and emotions in different situations.
Learning how to dream, create a vision, set goals, plan ahead, and accomplish meaningful action steps.
Taking care of one’s self also means getting to know who they are, what are their strengths, and what’s important and meaningful for them.
Because getting to know the self, your values, principles, dreams, wants, and desires, will inform the decisions and actions you will take in the future.
Because taking care of one’s self can be a complicated affair if you don’t know what works for you, and what you want in life.
Because taking care of one’s self won’t be effective if you don’t have the power to choose for yourself, and you don’t have the freedom to decide and create in your life.
Because being an adult is being able to “stand on your own two feet, and walk towards wherever you choose to.”
Being able to take care of others.
Being an adult doesn’t just stop with being able to take care one’s self. It also means using what one has to be able to take care of others.
And taking care of others can take many different forms.
It can be as parents of a family.
It can be as leaders, both informal and formal, as role models and examples. The team leaders, the office boss, the group head, the party coordinator, the follower, the team member.
Bottom line, is that what we do as adults has a productive, positive impact on the people we affect and touch, directly or indirectly. Through what we do, or maybe, even what we don’t do.
It doesn’t have to be complicated, even the most basic of actions can have profound effects on others.
If all we think about is ourselves, then we’re no better than kids. We’re living in an interconnected world, where your actions, somehow, someway, affect me, and vice versa.
We’re all connected, and to believe that our actions only affect us, and us only, is untrue.
In the long run, that will also only serve to hurt us. No person is an island, and how we treat others, is eventually, the way we are going to be treated.
So if you want to be treated with kindness and respect, then treat others with such.
Essentially, the way we take care of others is the value we are appreciated for by the world and the workplace. No matter what job you do in your work, or how you earn a living, there are people being affected from your actions.
That’s also taking care of others.
Behind all the computer screens and faxed forms, emails and signatures and phone calls, there are real people.
Yes, real people, with dreams, feelings, plans, fears, pains, and lives.
Same as you.
Adult 101 – Take care of one’s self, and take care of others.
And again, it’s important to take care of ourselves. We can’t give what we don’t have. So if we don’t treat ourselves first with kindness and respect, how will we treat others that way?
It’s also important to take care of others as well. To help them on their journey, and to realize that all we do has an impact on the surroundings and the people around us.
What are some steps you can take to learn how to take care of yourself, and others as well?
Take action that’s meaningful and purposeful.
And build positive and productive habits.
Any tips you have for being and becoming an effective adult? Please share in the comments below!
[…] If you treat others with respect, then they are more likely to treat you with respect. […]