Growing Older Doesn’t Have To Suck

Living life isn’t about growing older.  It never was.

It’s all about growing.

It’s about growth.

 

Last year, I wrote 30 lessons I learned by 30 years old.  I feel thankful and blessed, yet still incomplete and looking.  Searching for something.

I wouldn’t necessarily say that I’ve found it.  Maybe I never will.  Sometimes, things sound better that way.

They won’t necessarily be better though.

And as I grow older by another year, I am constantly reminded of what little time we have on this earth, and about how we need to use our lives to the fullest.

Yet, at the same time, have enough breathing room for yourself.

 

Balance the head and the heart.

Promise me, you don’t want to burn out.  It’s such a dreadful, icky, beat-yourself-up, get-me-out-of-this-life kind of feeling.

And for the past months or so, I’ve been so focused on my head, my thinking, and breaking through what I’ve been telling myself for the longest time that I wasn’t, wouldn’t, be able to do.

It can be energizing, and freeing to myself, to be able to do, finally what I haven’t done for the longest time.

What is it, you ask?  It’s talking to strangers.  Complete, semi-random, strangers.

And yet, I hadn’t noticed that breaking through by just relying on push, motivation, and logic alone, took its toll on my heart.

It makes perfect logical sense and enlightenment to not be defined by the previous experiences and scripting that I received while I was growing up.

What did not make sense to me, was the increasingly growing hesitation, tiredness, emotional turmoil, and heaviness that I was feeling inside.

As a friend said, you can teach a soldier all of the skills of combat, but how much combat he can actually stomach an survive, is totally up to factors he’s not totally aware of, and might never be.

The soldier’s just got to be aware of his limit, and the signs that he’s breaking down, and cope and manage accordingly.

I’m blessed that I was able to notice the signs, and get help for my situation – of unknowingly exceeding limits and having the emotional baggage compound and get heavier and heavier.

The mind is a powerful thing, but we often take for granted the power of our feelings as well.

 

Experience is a powerful tool

When I was younger, I had more energy, but didn’t know what to do with it.

Now that I’m a bit older, I have less energy, yet I’m still able to do more things, and bring more of my talents and focus to bear on the problems I’m facing.

If you know, or can use it, your experience is such a powerful tool.  It can give you the shortcuts you need, as well the strength, and stability, to weather uncertainty and doubt.

Also, when I talk about experience, this isn’t just job experience, this is about life.

Life is a series of experiences.  Are we using what we have, to tackle what is to come?

Looking back on the past year, I realize that whether you look at your experiences in a helpful or woeful light is up to you.

Whether you learn from the experience is up to you.

At the same time, it doesn’t stop there.  Whether you use your experiences for good, and frame them in a manner that would help you, is also up to you.

You always have a choice, and you always have a say on what goes on in your life.

This goes for your feelings as well.

Do you accept your feelings?  Recognize them?

Accept them?

The longer you deny them, the more they compound, and complicate your inner environment.

Feelings is energy.

Negative feelings is negative energy.

And you don’t want that inside of you.

 

Break traditions, change traditions

Now, I’m in a meeting with inspiring people.  People who are coaches, trainers, and influencers, who make a big impact on other people’s lives.

It’s great and happy to be in such positive, supportive, nurturing, yet challenging and great company.

And yet, I’m breaking tradition.

I’m breaking a nine year tradition where I spend my whole birthday by myself, no phone, no screens.  Just me.

But then again, traditions are meant to change, through the years.

The rituals and actions might change, but the intention, the purpose, and the focus, remains the same.

I always wanted to spend the day alone to ground myself, and the find my center, and lick my wounds from the fear and pain that I was experiencing then.

Now, it’s still about grounding myself, and reconfirming my center.  Yet, the practice of just being by myself, could be done another day.  Now, it’s about how can I also impact other people, and help others, and not just myself.

I used to not exercise, and called that a tradition.  How’s that for being foolhardy.

The principles remain, even if the practices change.

Same with traditions.

 

Growing older doesn’t have to suck.

It doesn’t have to be such a chore either.  It’s up to you whether you fill your days with fun, or with foolishness.

And what’s fun or foolish?  That’s even up to you.

I’m not here to tell you how to live your life.  No one has the right to do that.

We’re all mirrors, reflecting what other people are telling us, back to them.

Reflecting to our outside world, what the makeup of our inside world is.

What we believe in our heads and hearts, we reflect out towards the world, and the life we live in.

The older we get, the more crystal clear, the more aware we are, and the bigger our mirrors become.

It’s not just age, but maturity as well.  You can grow up, without growing older.

Here’s to another year of growing.

Thank you, everybody.

Thank you.

 

What do you find fun about growing older?  Please share in the comments below!