One cardinal rule of living, is that if you’re not growing, you’re dying.
If you’re not learning how to make a better life for yourself, nobody else is going to come and do it for you.
If it’s anyone’s responsibility to improve our lives, and make it a better place, it’s us.
And this doesn’t come naturally, we have to learn how to have a better life.
However, and whatever that looks like for you.
What are skills you need to learn to have a better life?
Taking responsibility
Because if you expect other people to come through for you, and make your life better, then you’re in for a big surprise.
And an even bigger disappointment.
In my lowest of times, I was doing exactly this, hoping and waiting for other people to come out and shower me with blessings, and save me from where I was.
And when that didn’t happen, I kept blaming others for what was happening to me. I blamed my parents, my past, my upbringing, where I studied, the people I was with, and even random strangers that I didn’t know!
“It was all their fault that my life is in the pits!” I screamed inside, while ignoring the tiny little voice that knows that I was lying, I was hurt, and that I was not taking responsibility.
And yet, if there’s anyone in the world who has the most power to make a positive impact on our lives, it’s us.
It’s you.
The sooner you begin to take responsibility for your actions, choices, decisions, and even words, the sooner you can steer and guide your life to the direction that you want.
Stop blaming others.
Start making decisions.
Start taking action.
You’re in charge.
How to be happy
People want to be happy, but yet, have difficulty learning that being happy is a skill, and that you have to learn it, develop it, practice it, and use it when you need it the most.
The common belief is: “I have to get _________, to feel ___________.”
Meaning, something has to happen first, before I feel something. In this case, happiness.
I found myself believing this, and sometimes still fall into this trap. Past experiences and conditioning can be difficult to unlearn.
“I have to get a lot of money, to feel happy.”
I kept on telling myself that. That I needed money to find happiness.
But that’s not how happiness works.
You can learn to be happy, whether you have money or not.
You just haven’t learned the skill of being happy, and are relying on outside influences to make you feel happy.
Look at the billionaire who’s not happy, versus the poor, simple man, who is happy, despite not having a lot of money.
Life will throw shit at you, and won’t give you what you want, at least not right away. It’s your choice, and your power, to find what makes you happy, and to choose to be happy and to focus on the positive things, and the things you can do.
Even when you feel everything around you is burning down.
Find the small things, the little things, that mean happiness for you, that bring a smile to your face, and that inspire you.
Being happy is not about getting.
It’s about thinking, and seeing.
It’s about doing.
It’s about believing.
Perseverance
Because life is a marathon, and not a sprint.
Not all time, life will be great, and that you’ll get what you always want, and feel what you want to feel.
There will be tough and trying times, along with the happy and hopeful times.
The key here, is to persevere.
To keep on going, despite the difficulties and challenges, to go after what’s most important to you.
There is no such thing as get rich quick, no overnight sensation. All the hard work has been hidden under veils of glamour, bright lights, and the instant gratification that we all seek so desperately.
There is no magic button to success.
There is however, a proven roadmap to success.
And that’s to put in the work, day in, day out, and to persevere through challenges and hardships.
Even through times where you want to give up, and you feel it’s not important for you anymore.
That’s part of perseverance, to check yourself, and to course correct.
And to re-commit to you dream, your purpose, goal, or vision.
Don’t stop. Keep going.
Take a break
At the same time, you have to learn when, and how, to recharge yourself.
Because life is a marathon, and not a sprint.
You don’t see marathoners go all out, all the time.
They pace themselves, and find ways to make the best use of energy, and to recover their energy as well.
Learn how to take a break effectively. Not the “turning into a vegetable” mode kind of break.
Find out what recharges you, and what activities make you feel rested not only physically, but emotionally as well.
Learn how to take care of yourself. You are your greatest asset, your greatest tool to make your dreams come true.
But all of that flies in the face of what’s best for us, in exchange for what will make us feel good in the moment.
Go all out, then recharge, then go all out. Life is a cycle, and the same goes for energy, effort, and time.
Practice
Skills and habits are muscles. You start off small first, then as you keep using and using them, for harder and harder situations, they grow and become stronger.
What’s important here is the consistency and intentionality of the practice. You must want to get better. You must want to grow, and must take the action necessary to make that happen.
Everyone who has gotten stronger didn’t do so by accident. They did it to overcome, to survive, to grow, to feel good.
There is a reason. A very compelling reason.
What’s a better life for you?
What makes that life important?
And keep practicing, until that picture, becomes reality.
What skills would you recommend to have a better life? Please share in the comments below!
Leave a Reply