5 Ways To Take Care Of Yourself

Reality check – we don’t really get to take care of ourselves, and we don’t deliberately get to take care of ourselves, enough.

This post won’t be about getting a massage, scheduling some free time, going swimming, taking a vacation, getting enough sleep (which is important!), or some zen meditation.

This is post is about definite foundational practices and habits that you can use to continually train and allow yourself to take care of yourself.

A person who can take care of themselves, builds more freedom in their lives, and are more able to be self-aware, take meaningful action, and build habits to sustain their momentum.

What’s the first way to take care of yourself, that would make your life easier?

 

Be forgiving

One uncomfortable truth that I’ve come to accept is that I’m good at keeping grudges.

I was quick to anger, and slow to forgive.  In the darkest of days, I still am.

What I didn’t realize was that by keeping grudges and not forgiving others, I was allowing myself to hurt myself.  I was creating a burden on myself, letting past actions and behavior affect my current situation and frame of mind.

By being forgiving, I allow myself to let go of those burdens and baggages, and can return to focusing on taking care of myself, others, and moving forward.

Instead of being stuck in the past.  Being stuck in memories and past hurts.

This doesn’t only apply to others.

It also applies to yourself.

There was also a time I wasn’t able to forgive myself for making mistakes and failing.  I’d beat myself up, and let those feelings linger and affect my day and decisions.

When I started to learn to forgive myself, I felt an even greater burden lifted, and felt more free as a result.

I had to accept and allow myself that I can, and do make mistakes, and that it’s OK.  It’s not the end of the world, and it won’t label me permanently as a failure.

Failures are stepping stones to learning.  It’s up to us how we handle it, whether we are also forgiving of ourselves, or as hard on ourselves, as on others.

To be forgiving is to let go of burdens, and to be free.

 

Write things down

And I mean, physically, with a pen, on paper, write things down, and not type them down.

Research shows writing things down helps our memory, and helps learning as well.

Writing down thoughts and feelings enable us to thresh them out, and articulate them the best we can.  To look at them objectively, to think and reflect, and possibly gain new insight and learnings about our behavior and ourselves.

Writing things down practices the mind-body connection.  When I was a student formator studying counseling, I remember a very important concept taught to us:

“The mind may forget, but the body remembers.”

And this is true of athletes, musicians, or any skill we practice.  Our mind may forget the step by step process by which we do tasks, but our body remembers, without us thinking.

Writing things down enables us to look at our thoughts and feelings objectively, separate from us. It helps us not to get caught up, and be able to think more clearly and more freely.

 

Spend some alone time, doing fun things

having alone time helps a lot, but having too much alone time just reflecting and thinking can just cause more confusion and doubt.

Instead, have a date with yourself.

Pick an activity you enjoy, and schedule some time to go do the activity.

Without friends, or people you know beforehand. If it’s a group activity, do it with strangers, or a new group.

Because for the date, you want to focus on yourself. On you enjoying, on what you want and where you want to go.

Not thinking about the group.

Not thinking about other people, and what they want.

Think about yourself.

Think about what you want.

 

Unplug

Spend 24 hours, a whole day, not staring at any screen.  Of any type.  For whatsoever reason.

Find other means of fulling the time and entertaining yourself, or making yourself productive.

Electronic games and gadgets, especially the internet, make it too easy for us to be distracted, and teaches our minds and our bodies to expect instant results, and to feel frustrated when we don’t get these.

How is this self care?  When all my entertainment is on my computer, my friends and family are on my phone, and all the news in the world is on TV?

Well, you don’t need them all the time,

but you need you, all the time.

Instead of focusing attention outward, unplugging forces you to focus attention inward, and on your immediate surroundings.

It forces you to focus your attention on the people you interact face to face, to the sights, sounds, and feelings you encounter as you go about your day.

Uninterrupted by the beep on your phone, signaling a message.

Uninterrupted by news that’s being broadcasted on television.

Uninterrupted by the easy distraction the computer, and the internet, can give you.

The days when I’ve unplugged, and planned for it, have been some of the most recharging, yet productive days I’ve ever had.

It feels good to focus on a single task, and follow through to completion without distractions and interruptions vying for your limited attention.

 

Allow yourself to be taken care of

Do you feel, that no matter what, you are worthy of being taken care of?  That you are worthy of being loved?

Let’s face it – not all of us feel that way.  I used to feel that to be worthy of being loved, I had to work for it.  If i didn’t do anything productive, or of value for other people, then I felt that I wasn’t deserving of care and love.

How wrong I was.

You may say things differently than I did, but deep inside, we may have believed the same thing.

Your mindset, your belief about taking care of yourself, is the major factor that determines how well, how easy, or how hard it can be for you to take care of yourself.

Have a mindset that says:

“I am worthy of being loved and taken care, just for simply being me.”

How do you begin to cultivate this mindset?  Here are some tips I shared before.

 

It’s not that people are not taking care of us

It’s that we are not taking care of ourselves.  Enough.

Imagine the many different ways we resist.  The many ways we are not allowing ourselves to be taken care of.

For whatever reason.  Be it prode, fear, anger, hurt, pain, insecurity, self-doubt, or overconfidence.  Or whatever it is.

Begin by saying “yes” to yourself.

And saying “no” to others, so you can say “yes” to yourself.

“Yes.”

 

What are the ways you take care of yourself?  Please share in the comments below!