What Makes Habits So Hard To Change? (Even If You Know Them!)

I know smoking is bad for me, but it’s so hard to stop.

I know that if I cut the amount of rice and bread I eat, I’ll lose weight.

I know that if I practice writing, instead of taking naps, I’ll be a better writer.

We all know what’s helping or hindering us, but knowing is different from actually doing.

What makes habits so hard to change, even though we know?

 

Repetition

When you get used to doing something, like brushing your teeth, how you roll out of bed, it gets hard to change these little things.

Same for the big things as well.

It’s hard to change them because of the repetition that we put into doing these activities.

Like a path that you keep on walking on, and gets deeper, deeper, and doesn’t allow the grass to regrow.

So even if you want to change a habit, and you may be successful in the first few tries, if you don’t find a way to divert the actions, the desires of the habit, or something to replace it, you’re just going to fall back into the same habit.

That’s the power of repetition to suck you back into the habits you’ve been doing for so long.

And if you don’t have something to replace the habit you want to change, you’ll just keep on doing it.

 

Comfort

We find it hard to change our habits because we find our habits comfortable.

I don’t want to deal with the discomfort, and the fear, of having to try something new.  I’d rather stick to what I know instead.

Even at the cost of opportunity.

Even at the cost of my future.

This sucks.

As human beings, we’re not hardwired for self-actualization, for fulfilling our potential.  We’re wired for survival, and if our basic needs are met, it takes a large amount of effort to be able to continue to push ourselves to greater and greater heights.

So we seek comfort, and hold on to whatever scraps we have of it, even if it won’t benefit us in the long run.

We find it hard to change the habits we have, thanks to the comfort we find in them now.

 

Lack of commitment

If there’s one thing that will help to build, change, or break a habit, it would be the commitment to do so.

And I mean, to find and do whatever it takes to be able to get the result that you want.

Right now, I’m stalling when it comes to my fitness goals.  I realized that I wanted to get fit, but I didn’t want it enough.

I didn’t want fitness enough to say no to sugary drinks, rice, carbs, and snacks, even when I’m at work.  I didn’t want it enough to commit to putting in the effort, to finding the time to put in my workouts, even when I have full days of facilitating and speaking.

I didn’t have enough commitment to clean out my refrigerator, and to say no to unhealthy options, or to eating too much.

Dig deep, and find your compelling why.  Find the reason that you’d commit to and make things happen.

 

No idea what’s on the other side

Because people have known their habits, and what it’s like to live out their habits, all their life.

And they’ve never had an experience of what’s otherwise.  What’s life like on the other side.

See, I realized that one roadblock I had to selling well, was that I’ve never had an experience, even having watched someone, close a big deal.  I’ve never seen somebody handle rejection many times over, and still come out a winner.

I had no idea what success looks like, what it feels like, and so I grope in the dark, looking for clues if I’m succeeding.

In the meantime, I hang on the the new habit I’m trying to do, or I’ve already fallen back onto my old, unproductive habits.

If you find an experience that shows you that it can be done, and what success looks like, it will be easier to break out of your comfort zone, to commit, and to get to changing and achieving.

 

What makes habits so hard to change?  Please share your experiences in the comments below!