I’m so afraid of rejection, but I just realized it could be a good thing.
I’d go so far to call it the number one thing that’s holding me back, and at the same time, the fastest way for me to reach my dreams.
Being rejected can be one of the best ways to be loved, and to show love.
How is that even possible, especially when it hurts like nothing else?
Get away from resentment
You know what’s worse than a NO?
A half-hearted yes.
It’s like you want to, but you don’t. You’re wishy-washy, can’t decide, can’t commit, and when hardship comes because of your choice, you whine and complain about it.
Because deep down inside, you really didn’t want to, but you got pressured to.
I have a hard time saying no, owing to the fact that I want to be of help to people. That’s not always true, and that’s not what should always be the case.
Because when I say YES to other people in this way, I am actually saying NO to myself. I don’t want that. I am losing myself in the process.
And the resentment that builds up in me is poisonous, and taints all that I do, and affects the quality of my relationships.
I once had a job that I grudgingly took out of need, and though I am grateful for the experience and opportunity, I knew deep down that wasn’t for me.
Rejection doesn’t give you the space to wallow in the middle. Either you go for it fully, or you don’t at all.
No half-assing, no resentment. Why bother blaming yourself, when you can be true to yourself, and be proud of your choice instead?
Overcome NOs, to get to the true YES
Would you rather have noncommittal, unrequited, ungrateful relationships? Or relationships that’s full of love, happiness, sincerity, authenticity, and trust?
In my life, I’ve encountered a lot of rejection. Sometimes, I feel, not enough.
Because I’ve found myself just accepting, giving in, saying yes, just so I won’t get rejected.
But then again, that’s not a true yes. A yes that comes from myself, and from others, with no reservations, a commitment to make it work, and the sincerity to connect.
Not just for the sake of saying Yes. It’s important to receive the NOs as well, and to overcome them.
Love means overcoming the NOs to get to the true YESes in your life. The things, people, places, that you feel care for you, look out for your well-being, and commit to you.
Which also includes – yourself.
Rejection is love. It’s loving other people, because you really don’t like them, don’t want to be with them, so you say no to cut the agony.
And you say yes to yourself. That’s love.
It teaches you to love yourself
Getting rejected again and again is a masterclass on perseverance and self-love. It’s what separates the mediocres from the masters.
Not everything will be handed to you on a silver platter, and surely, not everything that goes your way will come to stay.
Rejection teaches you to be there for yourself, and to love yourself. If you won’t accept and love yourself, then who will?
At a subconscious level, this is one reason why we reject people. Because we can smell the fear, and the self-rejection, and decide that we don’t want to be a part of that.
If rejection is an obstacle in your life, then it is high time to begin making it a teacher in your life.
The first step? Learn to love yourself, and to tell yourself that rejection doesn’t define who you are, or what you can do.
It’s an opinion, a judgement, an observation. It doesn’t define your value.
You define your value. That’s love.
Don’t let rejection get in the way
Think of it as how other people show love to you.
They don’t want to hurt you, so they reject you. Sounds funny at first, but think about it.
Would you want a lifetime of resentment and misery? Or just a moment of discomfort?
Your choice, to love.
How can rejection be loving for you? Please share in the comments below!